Own Your Nerves 2/2

It went well, you think. They laughed at your mild jokes and seemed genuinly happy with the level of skills and experience you have. They're going to contact your references and get back to you by tomorrow afternoon at the latest.

Tick tock.. tick tock.. tick tock..

It's 2.30pm the day after your interview and those sweat marks are back. Your brain is thinking in over drive. You feel like, if you get the job, so much 'good' will come. But if you don't get it, what's already bad is only going to get a whole lot worse. You start to think about other ways you could have answered their questions. Better things you could have said. More examples you could have given. You check your phone every 2 minutes just incase you missed a call, even though you've had your phone on you for every waking moment since you left the interview - Even in the bathroom!

6pm. No phone call. Close of buisness was at 5pm, you know because you checked at 4.59pm. It's now safe to say you've been unsuccessful.

An old wise friend of mine once said - okay it was just yesterday and she's not old, but we'll go with it - "You could be on the path to something even better and all these knock backs are just tiny speed bumps in the grand plan."

For those of you out there who have been knocked back time and time again and the nerves get worse and worse each time you put yourself out there, think about that quote. Maybe you're on a different path to what you think you're on. Maybe it's a better plan. Maybe next time will be your time. (Or this time could still be your time - hang in there. There could be a reason for their late call.)

I know it's hard, believe me, I do. But try not to be nervous. Be yourself and accept yourself for who you are. One day, the hours you spend getting ready, and the time you spend sitting in your car killing time because you're paranoid about being late, will be worth it in the end.

Own your nerves.

Frantic Nerves 1/2

You've spent hours in the bathroom straightening or curling your hair, applying make-up, studying your face to make sure it looks just perfect. Then you've spent another hour and a half in your bedroom pulling everything out of the cupboard and draws trying to pick out the best outfit only to finally decide on what you had picked out the day before. Then finally, you’re standing in front of a full length mirror admiring your handy work with a straightener and an eye liner pencil, and let’s not forget those cute pair of heals you bought on sale just for this occasion. Finally, satisfaction.

But then, hang on, “why am I dressed like this? Why did I actually brush my hair today and dust off my make-up case? Oh yeah, I have a job interview!”

It’s about then when the sweat starts to bead on your forehead and the back of your neck starts to prickle. It’s about then when you thank yourself for deciding to wear a black suit so no one will see the growing sweat marks under your arms.

Nerves...

So you frantically put the straightener away hoping it was cooled down enough, but that would have to wait til later. You brush your teeth and check to make sure your breath doesn’t smell because that would be a major turn off! You grab your already lined up and organised things – handbag with wallet and phone already placed inside, cover letter and resume – go to walk out the door and realise you forgot your keys. So you run back in to get them. But now you feel like you’re running 10 minutes late, so you roar up the street only to arrive half an hour early.

15 minutes is early enough so you decide to kill the extra 15 minutes by sitting in the car. You don’t want to look too keen – desperate.
Meanwhile, the sweat patches under your arms have doubled in size and the make-up you spend hours on has practically all melted off. And there is nothing you can do about it.

Your mind is racing, trying to be ready for any questions they may throw at you. But it turns you crazy because you can’t possibly know what they’re going to ask – making you go scatter-brained. So you think about calming yourself down. You take deep breaths and tell yourself “You’re going to be great. They’re going to love you.” You’re ready to go in.

Tick tock.. tick tock.. tick tock..

To be continued...

Isn't it funny when...

Your toes are so cold that when you step into the bath they feel like they're getting burned to a crisp and will fall off at the sign of any movement.

You speak with a guy that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside, and not to mention giddy, even if he's talking about crap.

You accidently eat the sticker on your apple.

You send an embarrassing text message... to the wrong person.

You get caught wearing the same shirt 2 days in a row - It's totally still clean!

You say goodbye to someone and then walk off in the same direction.


*I know there are more funny moments like these... Don't be shy to comment your own funny moments :)*

When life gives you lemons...

Once upon a time I was laying in bed thinking about what I could write my next blog about when I got to thinking about lemons and how sour they can be. Then that got me thinking about the old saying, when life gives you lemons... turn them into lemonade. There are so many negative things that surround our everyday lives and it's hard to think of ways to turn them into positives. So anyway, I took a classic saying of turning a negative into a positive and this is what I came up with.

When life gives you lemons: weak, hate, enemy, nothing, lonely, insignificant, failure, embarrassment, geek, insane, vicious, empty, sorrow, yuk, obese, ugly, limited, evicted, meaningless, obsolete, neurotic, sad.
 
Turn them into lemonade: terrific, unique, real, nice, tasteful, happy, excellent, meaningful, interesting, new, together, optimistic, laughter, ecstatic, magical, outstanding, notable, delightful, extraordinary.

Beauty is pain

You know that pain that makes you clench your teeth, suck in a breath and puff out your chest all at the same time. The kind of pain where you really want to cry but you know that would be weak, so you don’t. It's the kind of pain you know that once it's over, it's going to be worth it in the end.

I watched a girl have her hair bleached this afternoon. She said she wanted to look good. She said she was ready for anything, as long as it would look good in the end.

I watched as the blue paste was applied. She had a smile on her face. Happy that she'd soon be looking good, glamourous and spectacular. Only a minute or two later she was walking around in circles, shaking her hands, doing everything she could to get herself through the pain. Her head, her scalp, was buring while she paced. Sill with a smile on her face. "It's okay, I'd rather have blisters than look bad," she said. I couldn't help but suck in a breath and look away myself, just watching her.

Once the paste was washed out, she definately did have blisters. Through the bleach blond roots of her hair, I could see her red, red scalp. I couldn't be sure, but it must have been bleeding. "It's okay, I told you to do it," she said to the hairdresser, who was apologising profusely.

The girl i watched endure so much pain was indeed happy with the result. "Beauty is pain," she said.

So for those of you out there who don't know what it takes to look beautiful - It takes a lot. It takes a cunning and adventurous personality as well as bravery. So remember... Beauty is pain.

Lost in a Battle Zone

I was driving on the highway this morning minding my own business. I was singing my head off to my favourite song that was of course blasting through my broken speakers to drown out my awful screeching.

Okay, so I’m driving along, doing what I do, when I can’t help but notice the army trucks on the other side of the highway going in the opposite direction. I’m talking green, tan and whatever the other colours the army has, trucks. There were 5 or 6 of them all travelling along, one after the other. On the top of each of them there were 2 or 3 army people, standing, watching where they’ve been. I could tell they were army people because they were all dressed in the same army colours as the truck. They even had hard hats and all in those colours! I suppose they’re camouflage colours, but I could still see them when I was travelling 100km/h in the opposite direction! There were guns positioned on the top of the trucks to, at the ready. Just in case.

When I saw these trucks, I couldn’t help but think about war…

Would I see an opposing team chasing after the trucks I saw? Would I drive into a battle zone? Were the trucks driving away from a war scene? Were they going towards a war? What on earth was happening? - If anything at all.

After hearing recently of the death of a worldwide known terrorist, Bin Lardin, I couldn’t help but think that the war from overseas could possibly be coming to Australia. It is a very real possibility that was could come of that it’s already hear.

Sometimes I get a feeling that I’ve missed something. Like I’ve missed a major news headline that I should have seen or heard about by now. I sometimes feel out of the loop, like my life has been travelling along some current or rip, like tunnel vision, but it’s my life.

Thinking about war also makes me think about all the Australian’s who are overseas fighting to keep the war out of Australia. They’re also fighting for other countries because of their alliance with us. It makes me think of them risking their lives for my safety, for the safety of my family and friends. It makes me think of their families and how worried they must be. Those men and women are the bravest people I’ve ever thought about. I don’t know anyone personally, but I can imagine the fear their families endure.

Getting back on track...

So when I was driving along, singing along terribly, minding my own business, the world or my country could have very well, broken out into war. If that would be the case I’d be lost. I’d be lost in a war. Lost in a battle zone.

Process of elimination

An issue is only an issue if you have an issue with it. Eliminating the issue:

We start with something whole. Something with a question, an issue. Then we take that something whole and split it up into something like a... well a mess really. Then we have to organise the mess into subjects, piles or categories so we know what everything is and what we're going to do with that mess. The next step put the mess back together, back to being a whole.

So again, we have something whole, something with a question, an issue. The only difference now is that we have an organised mess within the whole. So one by one, we take one pile away from the whole to find out if that's what the question is, what the issue is. The process is repeated until the question or issue is found.

It's only when the question or issue is found that we can deal with it. And by deal with it, I mean, eliminate it.

Eliminate the issue.

This is me...

I'd like to be able to sing that song from Camp Rock but I can't. It would totally tell you all exactly who I am, but I guess because I can't sing, this will have to do. I've always been the kind of girl, that hid my face. I'm so afraid to tell the world what I've got to say. Haha kidding. But really, I think every girl, well guys too - people in general really - could relate to that song. There are so many pieces about ourselves that we'd like to open up and show the world but we're too self conscious to do anything about it. It's like when I had singing lessons when I was younger; i'd sing in front of my teacher because I had to - and frankly, we were paying her to listen to me - but I would purposely sing like a loser in front of my family and then joke about it. It's easier to put ourselves down that it is to stand up and put ourselves out there.

Okay, so me... I like to write. I've just recently - in the last few days - finished writing a story. Cool I know. It's titled 'Bound by Elimination' - hense the name of my blog. It's been a long journey and in actual fact, I finished it nearly a year ago, but I've just finished going through it and making it BETTER! It's been an amazing experience getting to know my characters and if I had kids, I'd say that I love them more than my kids. Kidding! I have a dog named Sally and I love her more than my characters because I didn't make her up. She's her own self and she surprises me all the time. That's the difference between real people and Characters though. My characters never surprise me... because I made them up!

Right now, literally while I write, BBE is in the process of being checked by a friend before I send it off to a publisher. The publisher whom I'm dearly hoping will read the first page and fall in love and offer me MILLIONS just to finish reading it! I don't think that's ever happened before in the history of publishing - but we can always hope.

So anyway, I guess you will learn about who I am along the way/as I update.